Thieves may sell your information on the black market or use it to obtain money, credit or even expensive medical procedures. Unless you're vigilant in protecting your records, you'll have to work even harder to repair the damage to your credit. The average victim spends 30 to 40 hours rectifying the problem.

Some of the e-threats to your identity are:

• Phishing. You get an e-mail that appears to be from your bank or an online service, most often PayPal or eBay, instructing you to click on a link and provide information to verify your account.

• Pharming or spoofing. Hackers redirect a legitimate Web site's traffic to an impostor site, where you'll be asked to provide confidential information.

• Smishing. This is phishing done with text messaging on your smart phone. It instructs you to visit a bogus Web site.

• Spyware. You've unknowingly downloaded illicit software when you've opened an attachment, clicked on a pop-up or downloaded a song or a game. Criminals can use spyware to record your keystrokes and obtain credit card numbers, bank-account information and passwords when you make purchases or conduct other business online. They also can access confidential information on your hard drive.

You don't need to have a computer to become a victim. (See "How safe is your financial information?")

• Vishing -- voice phishing. You get an automated phone message asking you to call your bank or credit card company. Even your caller ID is fooled. You call the number and are asked to punch in your account number, PIN or other personal information (See "Your phone may be under attack.")

• ATM skimming. Crooks use a combination of a fake ATM slot and cameras to record your account information and PIN when you use a cash machine.

• Crooks will steal your wallet, or go through your mail or trash.

More than half of identity theft cases involve credit card fraud. Checking accounts are the second most popular target. (See "Keep thieves out of your bank account.") But some crooks have other plans:

• At least 250,000 people have been the victim of medical identity theft in the last several years. (See "Diagnosis: Identity theft.") Crooks use fraudulently obtained personal information to get expensive medical procedures or dupe insurance companies into paying for procedures that were not done.

• The victims of about 5% of reported identity theft cases are children. The fraud often goes undetected for years -- until the young adult applies for credit. (See "Stolen innocence: Child identity theft.")

16 tips to protect yourself

You can take steps to protect yourself from identity fraud:

• Keep your confidential information private. Your bank or credit card company won't call or e-mail to ask for your account information. They already have it.

• Keep an inventory of everything in your wallet and your PDA, including account numbers. Don't keep your Social Security card in your wallet.

• Stop getting banking and credit card information in the mail. (See "Go paperless for safer banking.")

• Monitor your bank and credit card transactions for unauthorized use. Crooks with your account numbers usually start small to see if you'll notice.

• If you conduct business online, use your own computer. A public computer is less secure, as is wireless Internet.

• Look for suspicious devices and don't let anyone stand nearby when you use an ATM. Take your card and receipt with you. Keep your PIN in your head, not your wallet.

• Don't store credit card numbers and other financial information on your cell phone. (See "Is your cell phone spilling your secrets?")

Protect your computer from vulnerability:

• Install anti-virus, anti-spyware and firewall protection, and keep them up to date.

• Don't open e-mails from strangers. Malware can be hidden in embedded attachments and graphics files.

• Don't open attachments unless you know who sent them and what they contain. Never open executable attachments. Configure Windows so that the file extensions of known file types are not hidden.

• Don't click on pop-ups. Configure Windows or your Web browser to block them.

• Don't provide your credit card number online unless you are making a purchase from a Web site you trust. Reputable sites will always direct you to a secure page with an URL starting with https:// whenever you actually make purchases or are asked to provide confidential information.

• Use strong passwords: at least six characters, including at least one symbol and number, and no reference to your name or other personal information. Use a different password for every site that requires one, and change passwords regularly.

• Never send a user name, password or other confidential information via e-mail.

• Consider turning off your computer when you're not using it or at least putting it in standby mode.

• Don't keep passwords, tax returns and other financial information on your hard drive.

6 steps to clean up the mess

If you suspect your identity may be compromised, place a fraud alert with the three credit bureaus. When you place an alert, you are entitled to a free copy of your credit report. After that, take advantage of the free annual reports the bureaus are required to give all consumers. Stagger your requests so that you get a report every four months.

• If you've been phished, contact the bank or company named in the fraudulent e-mail. You also may want to notify the Internet Crime Complaint Center and forward the e-mail to spam@uce.gov.

If you are the victim of identity theft, take the following steps:

• Make an identity-theft report to the police and get a copy. File a complaint with the Federal Trade Commission.

• Close accounts that have been tampered with. Contact each company by phone and again by certified letter. Make sure the company notifies you in writing that the disputed charges have been erased. Document each conversation and keep all records.

• Place a seven-year fraud alert or, if you live in a state that allows it, a "freeze" on your credit reports. (See "Lock your credit away from ID thieves.")

• Begin the process of having the fraudulent information removed from your credit reports. (See "Don't let credit-report errors fester.")

• Find victim support at the Identity Theft Resource Center.

Brad Lipman's dinner out with his family turned out to be much more expensive than he expected, at least temporarily.

When he paid for the meal last summer with his debit card, someone in the restaurant -- he still doesn't know who -- swiped it through a portable card reader, which copied the account information. Within a few weeks, thousands of dollars had been stolen from his bank account.

Lipman, who lives in Thousand Oaks, Calif., is one of thousands of people affected by "skimming," criminals stealing credit card information when cards are used at ATMs, restaurants or other retail locations. Skimmers siphon about $60 million a year from bank accounts, according to the Electronic Funds Transfer Association.

"We're seeing more of it," says Todd Davis, the chief executive of the security company LifeLock in Tempe, Ariz. One common technique, he says, is placing a skimming device over the card slot of an ATM. The skimmer looks like a piece of plastic to guide cards into the slot, but it picks up bank information as the card slides through.

More ATM use means more incidents

The devices are also used for legal purposes, such as registering conference attendees or making sales at small retail stores. An eBay spokeswoman said that the company allows the sale of the devices because they are legal, but that sellers are prohibited from marketing the devices for fraudulent use under the company's policy against encouraging illegal activity.

Kurt Helwig, the president of the Electronic Funds Transfer Association, which promotes electronic commerce, says that though the number of skimming incidents as a percentage of overall ATM use hasn't grown, the increase in ATM use overall means that skimming is happening more often. Although it's still a rare occurrence and there's no need to avoid ATMs, he says, consumers should be wary.

"If you see something that looks funny or doesn't look right, with wires hanging out or a stupid sign (directing consumers to a different card slot), don't use that ATM, and let someone know," Helwig says.

Banks must reimburse

Many banks have added security measures, such as monitoring ATMs with physical inspections as well as electronically during off hours, when skimming is most likely to occur. Margie Green, a spokeswoman for Wachovia, says the bank's ATMs are under watch 24 hours a day. Like most banks, Wachovia reimburses customers for any losses they incur from a skimming scam. By law, banks must reimburse customers for all but $50 of their losses, as long as they report the problem in a timely fashion.

Still, falling victim to skimming is not pleasant. Even though his money was refunded, "I felt absolutely as violated as can be," says Lipman, who has since started a company, TablePay Solutions, to help prevent skimming. The company distributes a machine to retailers that allows customers to swipe their own card, never allowing it out of their sight.

This article was reported and written by Kimberly Palmer for U.S. News & World Report.

Witness the lines of tourists snaking their way toward the famous Berthillon ice cream counter on the Île Saint-Louis in Paris, and you know that in the dog days of summer, nothing beats the heat better than a refreshing scoop of ice cream.

From rich, superpremium flavors such as Ben & Jerry's Chunky Monkey to reduced-fat offerings from Dreyer's to Berthillon's to-die-for pear sorbet, sellers have blanketed the market with confections to suit every taste and budget.

What many consumers may not realize, though, is just how big a business ice cream has become around the world.

The days of mom-and-pop parlors and local brands are fading fast. Today, the $59 billion ice cream industry is dominated by two global giants: Switzerland's Nestlé (NSRGY, news, msgs) and Anglo-Dutch conglomerate Unilever (UN, news, msgs). Together, they control more than one-third of the worldwide market -- and half of ice cream sales in the United States -- and they're looking to expand as they move into developing regions in Asia and Latin America.

• MSN Health & Fitness: Should you ditch dairy?

It's a high-stakes battle in a growing and profitable business. Researcher Euromonitor figures that global ice cream sales are rising 2.5% annually and will hit $65 billion in 2010.

Western Europe, the world's largest market, gobbled up $21.5 billion worth of ice cream and other frozen desserts last year, while North Americans devoured $16.3 billion worth. The most promising markets for growth are in emerging economies such as China and Brazil, where annual sales are soaring 8.5% and 8%, respectively.

Neither Nestlé nor Unilever had nearly so much presence in ice cream two decades ago. But starting in the 1990s, both began aggressive acquisition campaigns. Nestlé snapped up Hagen-Dazs, Dreyer's and Swiss brand Mvenpick. Unilever bought Breyers Ice Cream and Ben & Jerry's. Today, Nestlé boasts a 17.5% share of the world market, while Unilever is close behind with 16%.

The rest of the market is highly fragmented: The No. 3 maker in the United States, Wells' Dairy, has just 5% share. Other brands of note around the world are Baskin-Robbins (a unit of Dunkin' Brands) and Japan's Lotte, which remains No. 1 at home. China's top maker, Inner Mongolian Yili Industrial Group, has a 17% domestic market share and will be the sole dairy sponsor for the 2008 Beijing Summer Olympics.

Moving upmarket

The Swiss company got nearly 20% of its $42 billion in first-half 2007 revenues from its milk products and ice cream division. With pretax margins of 10.5%, the unit kicked in nearly $900 million in profits, up more than in any other part of the company. Unilever's ice cream and beverages division supplied just over 20% of its $26.7 billion in first-half revenues. Analyst Ian Kellett with brokerage Numis Securities figures ice cream alone accounted for 10% of Unilever's $3 billion of first-half profits.

To stoke growth, both companies have relied on getting consumers to pay more for frozen treats. With their tit-for-tat acquisitions of American icons Hagen-Dazs and Ben & Jerry's -- now distributed around the world -- the food giants have helped lead a consumer trend away from down-market, mass-produced brands to more profitable superpremium products.

"By focusing on superpremium brands, both companies have increased the value of their products," says Euromonitor packaged food analyst Francisco Redruello.

Better-for-you ice creams

Rising economies around the world should further the trend, as people have more money in their pockets to spend on goods such as upmarket ice cream.

"The focus on quality, indulgence brands has been integral to our growth," says Jean-Marie Gurne, head of Nestlé's ice cream strategic business unit. Gurne predicts Nestlé's worldwide ice cream sales should increase by 3% next year.

At the same time, both Nestlé and Unilever have been alert to growing health consciousness, particularly in Western Europe and North America. The industry has responded by rolling out lower-fat, lower-calorie products.

Nestlé's $2.5 billion takeover of Dreyer's Grand Ice Cream in 2002 helped it secure the lion's share of this increasingly important market in North America. Dreyer's low-fat "Slow Churned" line, with 50% less fat and 30% fewer calories, has proved a runaway success, even forcing Unilever to roll out similar products under its Ben & Jerry's marque.

"Better-for-you ice creams have been a real boost," says Carl Short, an analyst with Standard & Poor's. "Nestlé and Unilever are both focusing on this growth market in an attempt to attract new customers."

While such healthier options have helped boost sales in developed markets, the biggest growth prospects lie in Asia, where the ice cream business is set to increase by double digits over the next five years. Total revenue from the Asia Pacific region reached $11.6 billion last year, with $3.7 billion in China alone.

For now, market penetration remains low, although both Unilever and Nestlé are gearing up in countries such as the Philippines and Indonesia in hopes of attracting increasingly affluent consumers. Because many homes in developing countries don't have freezers, the companies are focused on selling single-serving portions through street vendors. That should help expand their markets in countries where refrigeration remains an out-of-reach luxury.

Locals squeezed from the market

As of now, Nestlé and Unilever appear evenly matched, though analysts say Nestlé has shown a greater willingness to innovate in local markets than its Anglo-Dutch rival.

Either way, the increasing globalization of the ice cream industry makes it hard for local makers to take on the big boys. With their massive distribution networks and rich marketing budgets, Nestlé and Unilever have an edge. And both have said they may make more acquisitions, particularly in Asia, in the future.

No question, the days of the local ice cream shop have passed. But as long as the European food giants provide a tasty treat to help people cool off in the summer heat, no one seems to mind.

This article was reported and written by Mark Scott for BusinessWeek.

Seduced into scams: Online lovers often duped

By Bob Sullivan

 

 
 

Watch VIDEO to be forewarned!

Richie's picture showed a jolly, bearded man curled up on a couch with a cat rubbing his face. "Loving, caring and hardworking," the online dating profile said.

When Theresa Smalley received a note from Richie last January asking if she wanted to chat, she was flattered. He seemed cute. The two began exchanging e-mails, friendly at first, but quickly swelling in intensity and passion. By Valentine's Day, Smalley received a box of chocolate candy, a teddy bear, and a helium balloon that said "I love you." Smalley, 46, was hooked, even though she had never met him.

Richie said he was from Milford, Mass., but that he was out of the country on a big construction job. He was helping build a stadium in Nigeria, he said. As soon as he returned, he promised, he'd come visit Smalley in Ohio. He couldn't wait, and neither could she.

The spirited e-mail romance hummed along for another two months before there was a problem. Richie said his boss paid him in postal money orders, and he was having trouble cashing them. Could Theresa do a small favor for him? Could she cash the money order for him, then wire the money to him in Nigeria? Smalley agreed, and over the next two weeks, she cashed two $900 money orders and sent along the funds. Then, Richie was ready to leave the country, but needed money to deal with a visa problem. She cashed another money order.

Then, Smalley's bank called her. Something was wrong.

"I had to call a special number at the bank. Even up until that point I still believed him. I had no qualms whatsoever cashing (the money orders)," Smalley said. Even after the bank told her the money orders had been altered — they were purchased for $20, but then "washed" and doctored to read $900 — she still held out hope.  But a friend pointed her to an Internet site devoted to Nigerian scams, and suddenly, Smalley's world crashed down around her.

'My whole world had fallen apart'
"The bank told me I was responsible for that money. I had to pay them $2,700, which was everything I had," she said. "I was devastated. I felt like my whole world had fallen apart.

Smalley shared her version of events with MSNBC.com in the hopes that others might not fall for the same trickery.

"Never in my wildest dreams would I have ever known that this is all a part of an elaborate online scam. He spent four months gaining my trust and he did it."

So-called Nigerian scams, where victims are ultimately tricked into sending money to the African country using some irreversible method like a wire transfer, are common. The Secret Service and other U.S. agencies have issued warnings on the scams, also known as "419" or "advance-fee" frauds. But the seductive flavor of this type of the scam — known to some as "sweetheart scams" — and the incredible patience shown by the scammer reveal just how far con artists will go to trick their marks. 

Ryan W. of Washington state, who asked that his last name be withheld, says he sent $15,200 to a similarly seductive scammer. And he wasn't even using an online dating service. Ryan was approached while hanging out in a chat room devoted to Grateful Dead fans. His seducer also claimed to be an American out of the country getting paid via money order, and also ultimately asked him to cash them. Five weeks later, when the bank came calling, all $11,000 in Ryan's bank account — most of it from a student loan earmarked for next semester's tuition — was frozen by his bank.

"Typically people go on the Net to get dates. I was just on there trading music," he said. "The thing that duped me was the whole music issue. She seemed to be into the music I was into."

Flowers bought with stolen credit cards
Nigerian-based con artists seem to have seized on sweetheart scams of late, said Dale Miskell, supervisory special agent in charge of an FBI cybercrime squad in Birmingham, Ala. Scam artists post ads to online dating sites and lurk in chat rooms with names like "40 and single," or "Recently dumped." Often, they reach out to a lonely soul with flowers or candy, purchased with a stolen credit card.

"A little gift of flowers or candy is a good aphrodisiac," said Miskell. "The next thing you know, they are in love. I can't tell you the number of women who have fallen for this."

Eventually, the con artists convince their soulmates to do them a big favor — help transfer funds out of the bank.

There have been so many victims that they are starting to find each other online. A new Yahoo group, "RomanceScams," was founded last month by Smalley and Barb Sluppick, who said she almost fell for a similar scam earlier this year. Among the hundreds of messages posted to the group are photographs of alleged scammers, links to potentially fraudulent online dating ads, and copies of come-on e-mails. The group is trying to publicize the problem to limit the damage.

"How many people are out there thinking they found the love of their life and they have no clue what's happening?" Sluppick said. "The first thing most people say to me when they contact me is, 'I can't believe I was so stupid.' "

Sweetheart scams appear to be on the rise, said Julie Ferguson, executive director of the Merchant Risk Council, which tracks scams for online retailers.

"I am definitely getting more calls on this. I used to get one every three months. Now, I get one every couple of weeks or so because it's the easiest way to get somebody hooked," Ferguson said. "The stories are so-gut-wrenching sad."

Some scammers seem to deliberately target groups set up for Christian singles, she said, where people may be less likely to be suspicious. "When you are meeting someone else on a Christian site, you think you are safe."

No dating site is immune from scams, said Jason Tarlowe, who operates MatchDoctor.com, where Smalley met Richie. "This hurts our business. We don't want this," Tarlowe said. "We're trying to do everything possible ... We don't want people to be taken in."

But they are, said Donna Gregory, supervisory internet crime specialist at the FBI's Internet Fraud Complaint Center. She said the con artists are relentless.

"We've even seen them take as long as a year (to seduce a mark)," Gregory said. Con artists will hunt for people's weaknesses, find out what they care about -- such as Grateful Dead music -- and then go in for the kill.

Sometimes, the online suitors don't even ask before sending money orders. They just send them, then guilt their targets into forwarding on the cash, Gregory said. In other cases, the con artists aren't after money -- they are after shipping help. They ask their correspondents to "re-ship" items to locations in Nigeria. The goods are often purchased with stolen credit cards, but the con artists have trouble getting them delivered out of the country, because many U.S. merchants are now wary of shipping to Nigeria. So the criminals need a middle-man.

"They say, 'Oh, once you have them, why not just send them? People say, 'I've got these packages and I don't know why,'" Gregory said.

Sluppick said one confused victim in her Yahoo support group currently has about $50,000 in merchandise that's been sent to her home, and she doesn't know what to do with it. 

The Merchant Risk Council's Ferguson said victims can always contact her agency for help returning merchandise to the retailers.

'Keep your money to yourself'
But there is no returning money to consumers who have wired funds overseas, hoping to cement a love bond. Smalley said other would-be victims need to know about the perils of online matchmaking, and they need to listen to the little voices of hesitation and concern inside that she failed to heed.

"So much came back to me after all of this was done," she said.  "I sat there thinking about everything. But these guys are professionals. They have the time. They have the patience."

Rhoda Cook has for years operated a Web site named straightshooter.net which maintains a database of sweetheart con artists. She's seen many varieties of romance scams, online and off. There's nothing new about charming men and women swindling would-be lovers, she said.

"When they invented the car, the con artist could drive to the next county. Now they can get on the Internet and go across the world," Cook said.  "When you meet someone and you really want someone you just want to believe them."

Her advice to daters is the same, online or off:

"Enjoy the relationship, but keep your money to yourself," she said. "That way, if it goes wrong, all you're going to lose is your heart."

Tips that you should follow when dating online:
1. If the profile photo is too good to be true, they are likely frauds (never give out your phone number, address, and of course credit card info.)
2. If they do not show any webcam when asked, they could be frauds
3. If their spelling errors are questionable, they could be frauds
4. If they called in and speak with a UK accent than an American accent when they said they are from the States, they are likely frauds
5. If their US phone numbers are of a different area code than the city (they usually use big, known cities) they said they are from, watch out!
6. If they cooked up some stories to ask you to wire money via Western Union especially to Nigeria (address like 10 Toyin Street, Ikeja Lagos State, Nigeria) WATCH OUT!!!
7. Use common sense, do a google search on all info. given before you let your heart out!

Fraud Resources:

Report these scams right away to anti-online dating frauds like:
1.  http://www.datingnmore.com/fraud/scam_addresses.htm
2.  http://www.fraud.org/
3. http://www.efccnigeria.org/
4. http://www.secretservice.gov/
5. http://www.state.gov/www/regions/africa/naffpub.pdf
6. http://home.rica.net/alphae/419coal/
7. http://fjallfoss.fcc.gov/edocs_public/attachmatch/DA-04-1738A1.doc

Tips to protect your identity, dos and don'ts: http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/17818062/

 

Scientists find reason for contagious yawning

LONDON - Showing empathy can make for a lot of yawning. A study of autistic children has bolstered evidence that people who identify better with others are more prone to contagious yawning, Japanese researchers say.

Scientists have long known that one yawn often leads others to follow suit but what triggers the phenomenon is not as clear, said Atsushi Senju, a researcher at the University of London who worked on the study.

Some believe it is simply a reflex. Others suggest the same mechanisms in the brain that make people feel empathy also cause them to yawn when they see others doing the same, he said.

In the study the team tested the reaction of autistic children and normal children when watching video clips of people yawning and then simply moving their mouths.

The researchers found the children with autism, a developmental condition that severely affects social interaction and communication including empathy, yawned less than other children during clips of people yawning.

Both groups of children yawned the same amount when watching the video of people only moving their mouths, showing that empathy was the key, Senju told Reuters.

“It supports the claim that contagious yawning is based on the capacity for empathy,” the researchers wrote.

Contagious yawning is seen in only a few other primates and studies have suggested the behavior has played an evolutionary role in helping groups avoid danger by keeping animals awake and alert.

The researchers said the findings offer a jumping-off point to investigate the nature of social and communication impairment in those with autism.

“Further studies are required to investigate the relation between contagious yawning and other symptoms of (autism) such as empathy, imitation and/or face fixation,” the researchers wrote.

The study is published in the Royal Society’s Biology Letters on Wednesday.

• Question -- He or she will want to know why, and whether there was anything he or she could have done to prevent the breakup. Answer the questions as honestly as possible.
• Cry -- The other person will likely be upset, and it will show. It is okay to comfort him or her, but don't allow yourself to be manipulated into changing your decision.
• Argue -- He or she may dispute anything you've said during the breakup, including examples you used in your reasons for breaking up. Don't get dragged into a fight, and don't split hairs. Let your partner know that arguing isn't going to change your decision.
• Bargain/Beg -- He or she may offer to change, or to do things differently in order to preserve the relationship. If the person didn't change when you've discussed your problems in the past, it is too late to expect him or her to truly change now.
• Lash Out -- Whether it's as simple as saying "You'll never find anyone as good as me" or as scary as saying "I'll make you regret this", he or she is usually just trying to make himself or herself feel better.
  

TIPS:

• Expect to spend at least one hour "breaking up", and longer if the relationship lasted a year or more.
• If at all possible, break the news "on their turf," i.e. at his/her home. At least be somewhere that they feel comfortable. They'll want to feel safe enough to cry/get angry/make a scene in general. While they might be willing to do these things at your place, making someone go home after getting news like that will make them more bitter.
• Many people feel that it is poor etiquette to break up by phone, e-mail, or through an instant messenger system. It is easier to break up with someone if you don't have to look the person in the eye, but you may lose the respect of your mutual friends if you take the easy way out.
• If you are sure you want to break up with somebody, it is best done sooner rather than later. However, if your partner has had a particularly bad day already, you may want to consider waiting for a better moment. Breaking up with them when they are already down will make them feel awful.
• While honesty is the best policy, you may want to soften the blow by avoiding sensitive issues (for example, most don't want to hear "I'm breaking up with you because your breath smells" ). However, being too vague can cause the other person to become even more upset.
• If at all possible, don't disappear as a method of ending a relationship. It shows a lack of respect both for the person and the relationship you had.
• Break up with him/her somewhere other than your house, workplace (etc.), because if you are over at their house, it is easy for you to leave, however if they are at your house, it could be tough to get rid of them.

WARNINGS:

• Never threaten that you will break up with your partner. If you have problems or concerns, work through them or break up. Threats of any kind will only make the relationship worse.
• Threats of physical harm are serious and should not be ignored. If you feel that your safety is at risk, contact the police as soon as it is safe to do so and request a restraining order.

1. Pick an appropriate place. The less public, the better. Remember, ending a relationship is a humbling experience. Don't do it in a place where the person on the receiving end is going to feel more vulnerable than necessary.
2. Choose the right time. Avoid holidays and special occasions like birthdays and anniversaries at all costs. Do you really want your ex remembering your insensitivity every time that day rolls around?
3. Do it in person. If the relationship is relatively new, maybe you can get away breaking up over the phone. But come on, if you've been out on more than a handful of dates, isn't that kind of harsh?
4. Be honest but sensitive. No one likes to get dumped. But we at least appreciate the truth when it's over. Unless, of course, the truth is you've stopped finding him/her attractive, you've met someone better, or that you're just plain bored with the relationship.
5. Keep your emotions in check. Don't seem too happy about the breakup: you'll come off as mean-spirited. Just be kind, caring, and considerate. If you must, you can high five your friends later.
6. Don't react. Some people don't handle rejection well. Some people yell, scream, cry. Yes, that sucks. But it doesn't mean you should react to their meltdown. Remember, rejection is tough. You've already got the upper hand by being the dumper. Let the dumpee behave ridiculously if they choose to. And if their tantrum escalates, get the heck out of there.

• Many people feel that it is poor etiquette to break up by phone, e-mail, or through an instant messenger system. It is easier to break up with someone if you don't have to look the person in the eye, but you may lose the respect of your mutual friends if you take the easy way out.
• If you handle yourself well during the breakup, chances are you'll avoid any hard feelings with your ex. And while that may not seem so important at the time, it's vital to your future relationship karma!
• The term "break-up" implies a hard stop. But, often, a break-up is really a change in the nature of a relationship, where friendship remains, but a closer physical connection, and a desire to build a life together, is taken away. Try to look at breaking up in a more positive way, and see how it can transform your relationship.
• Think about why you want to break up with them (e.g., you may suspect/hear rumors that they are cheating on you). Ask them FIRST. Everybody hates when you break up with them for a reason that isn't even true.
• Think about how maybe if you want out, they might too. Ask them where they think it's going. If something is making being together painful, tell them that being together is hurting you (e.g., long-distance relationships).
• Although it says above pick a private place, this can sometimes lead to emotional conversations that end in sex and another miserable month of "trying to make it work". If it's really over (see warning one), meet in a quiet public place local to the other person for a drink or a coffee. Tell them straight away and succinctly that the reason you're here is to say its over and why - be honest, give the true reason e.g. nothing you do will make up for the fact that you slept with someone else/the fact that you weren't there to pick me up from the hospital after my operation was the last straw, i need someone more dependable etc. Then leave money on the table to cover both drinks and leave. Do not cry until you're far away. Do not call them AT ALL and do not pick up their calls, preferably forever but at least not for two weeks - this helps to get some distance. Don't listen to their drunken answerphone messages, press delete when you hear their voice. Heal yourself : go out, shop, see movies etc. Find someone new!

• Weigh in carefully on your decision to break up, without analyzing it to death. Is this really what your heart wants? You may not be able to reverse your decision once it's made, and you may burn bridges in the process. Could you forgive yourself if you broke up with the man/woman of your dreams?
• Avoid cliches. If the person has heard it before, it may come off as insensitive.

Breakup Ground Rules

On the road to love…

What the car says about its owner: More often than not, an SUV driver is an organized person who might even be a bit of a paranoid pack-rat, Dr. Orbuch says. “AN SUV driver probably has everything from freeze-dried energy bars to emergency flares in the truck space,” she explains. The 4-wheel-drive tells you that this person wants to be prepared for both emergencies and for spontaneous adventures—a bit of a paradox, isn’t it? Dr. Orbuch notes that this person enjoys control and likes to be at the top of his or her game, whether it be sports, work, family, or trivia and ultimately is a motivated, energetic, and passionate person.

What the car says about its owner’s love style: “An SUV driver likely prefers his or her partners to also be organized, although it’s doubtful you can meet their standards in that department,” says Dr. Orbuch. She notes that the driver probably won’t mesh well with partners who lack a zest for life: “This person is looking for someone with a sense of adventure and even a bit of unpredictability—but chances are, he or she will have an extra toothbrush for you in case you forget yours!”

The car: A red convertible

What the car says about its owner: While it’s easy to assume that the owner of a shiny convertible is either flashy or going through a midlife crisis, Dr. Orbuch suggests otherwise: “Someone who drives this kind of car has two sides, each of which is revealed depending on the setting.” She says its driver can have a shy streak (a sexy car is akin to a conversation-starter), but in general (and especially in relationships) this person is an alpha-type.

What the car says about its owner’s love style: The convertible’s driver likes to lead a stylish life—so his or her mate had better appreciate that flair, too. What’s more, Dr. Orbuch observes, “someone who is social, outgoing and extremely comfortable with others is a good fit. If you’re the driver, you will have no problem if your mate is magnetically charismatic, just as long as he or she can loop arms and feel safe while you do the shining.” 

What the car says about its owner: As the SUV has become the most popular “car that hauls” choice in the vehicular marketplace, the driver who remains committed to rolling in a station wagon is clearly a traditionalist. “A station-wagon driver doesn’t like change and can’t seem to figure out what all the fuss is about new technology and such,” Dr. Orbuch asserts. “He or she is highly practical, but may have a secret penchant for high-priced comfort items like his and hers sheepskin seat covers,” she says.

What the car says about its owner’s love style: This driver is looking for a partner who is honest and sincere, just like he or she is—someone who isn’t afraid to trust and commit to a good relationship, Dr. Orbuch notes. “If the driver doesn’t have or want kids, it’s likely that he or she wants to get involved with a date’s extended family big-time—like for cookouts with the folks, family reunions, and so on,” she says. “His or her perfect partner is someone who will be a formidable badminton teammate at the next family gathering.” Nothing wrong with good, clean, wholesome fun, now is there?

The car: A Honda Accord or other sensible sedan

What the car says about its owner: Someone who drives this practical vehicle is most likely educated and intelligent, Dr. Orbuch says. “This driver probably likes discussing politics and is very well-read and mature,” she explains. “People who drive these kinds of cars don’t take big risks in life, but hey, that mentality has served them well up to now!” What you may find pleasantly surprising is that the driver probably has a lot of savings socked away. “This kind of person has invested his or her money well and may very well be enjoying a cushy lifestyle, but is just smart enough to know that a car is a horrible investment,” she explains. Ultimately, he or she cares about value, not flash.

What the car says about its owner’s love style: Its owner will most enjoy someone who likes to converse about life, Dr. Orbuch suggests. “He or she thinks that support, friendship, and honesty are essential to a good healthy relationship,” she says. Additionally, he or she probably doesn’t mind spending a lot of money on a mate—“especially when it comes to travel, fabulous hotels, and great restaurants,” she says. The thinking is: “I save when I can to splurge when I want.”

The car: A Jeep Wrangler or FJ Cruiser

What the car says about its owner: Believe it or not, this person is not a risk-taker, but would very much like to be. “More often than not, this kind of person’s life is pretty routine; he or she is super responsible,” Dr. Orbuch says. “However, this person has a slightly immature streak — that’s OK, by the way — that wants to step out and go wild. This car helps the owner express that part of his or her character; this individual wants to be perceived as young, carefree and spontaneous.”

What the car says about its owner’s love style: Because this driver is most likely not much of a risk-taker, when looking for a partner, he or she will be seeking someone who is. “He or she is up for something exciting and unpredictable and is probably looking for someone who is adventurous.” While the owner of this car is probably very tolerant of high-maintenance people and drama queens or kings, ultimately, Dr. Orbuch says, his or her main criteria in a mate is someone who knows how to have fun.

The car: A Toyota Prius or any other hybrid

What the car says about its owner: You guessed it: The person behind the wheel of a Prius chose an environmentally-friendly car because that cause is meaningful to him or her. “This driver is an energetic volunteer or cause-supporter who is often earnest and serious,” Dr. Orbuch notes. “This person is wearing his or her priorities on a sleeve (well, on the car…) and is interested in making a statement.” Just know that he or she “probably doesn’t have a sense of humor when it comes to rainforest preservation, veganism, or Dennis Kucinich,” she says. Ultimately, these drivers have good souls, she says: “People appreciate their commitment to their beliefs, even if they may be prone to preaching.”

What the car says about its owner’s love style: The hybrid driver is likely searching for someone who shares his or her politics and passions. “This driver is probably most apt to meet his or her perfect mate at a political march or a benefit,” says Dr. Orbuch. She also suggests that because this person may be a bit uptight in the love department; finding a mate who can loosen him or her up is essential.

The car: A BMW or other luxury sedan

What the car says about its owner: Owners of these types of cars — think the BMW 7 Series — believe that they’ve made their money, darn it, and they’ve got the right to spend, flaunt it and enjoy it. “They might be a bit annoying in the boasting department, but they are successful people who have earned some bragging rights,” says Dr. Orbuch.

What the car says about its owner’s love style: Dr. Orbuch says these people tend to be slightly insecure when it comes to relationships. “They are usually nervous about making big mistakes in the love department,” she explains. It’s important for them to feel successful in all aspects of their lives. While these drivers don’t mind someone who is impressed by their money, Dr. Orbuch says that they really do hope to meet someone who will like them for who they are. “The perfect mate for this kind of person is someone who is self-sufficient but genuinely happy to dote on a partner,” she says.

Chelsea Kaplan is Deputy Editor of www.thefamilygroove.com and regularly appears as a guest on XM Radio’s “Broad Minded.” Her blog, “I’m Somebody’s Mother?” can be found at www.rumymother.blogspot.com.  

Religious leaders’ love advice

Father Albert Cutié, president of Miami-based PAX Catholic Communications and author of Real Life, Real Love: Seven Paths to a Strong and Lasting Relationship
Ameena Jandali, a founding member of the Islamic Networks Group
Rabbi Sue Laikin Shifron, the executive director of the Hillel Center at Indiana University

Here’s their surprisingly consistent dating advice:

Q. How is faith-based dating different from typical social dating?
Father Albert: Choosing someone to date is usually directed, for Christians, toward a long-term relationship. Even as you’re just getting to know someone through dating, you always have in the back of your mind, “Is this the one? Is this my soul mate?” In a society where anything goes, it is important to have a sense of your values, such as abstaining from sex before marriage, to know what is acceptable to you and what is not.

Rabbi Sue: You date to find your beshert, your soul mate.

Ameena: The endgame of social dating tends to be physical intimacy, and Islam teaches that you should avoid anything that might lead to sex outside of marriage. If you’re a practicing Muslim, you try to avoid situations that may lead to intimacy, such as being totally alone with your date. While I suspect that many Muslim young people aren’t following these boundaries, conservative Muslims might be uncomfortable even sitting [alone] and talking to a date. You can interact with someone to get to know them and to consider them for marriage, but Islam’s view is that it’s better done in the company of others, much like it was once customary here in the West to be accompanied by a chaperone when courting. You are looking for some attraction and a complementary nature, and in some ways, you put your trust in God from there. The concept is called naseeb, which means destiny.

Q. Dating advice in scripture: Is there such a thing?!
Ameena: The Qu’ran and hadith both actually have a lot to say about marriage. A well-known prophetic saying gives four common reasons for marriage: beauty, wealth, family status, and religious life. It goes on to say that you should marry the religious person, because beauty, wealth, and even family can change. But a common dedication to moral ethics and values—that can you hold you together through good times and bad.

Rabbi Sue: One of the best-known Jewish teachings about what to look for in a wife is known as Eschet Chayil, which translates as ‘woman of valor.’ In modern times, you can interpret it for either spouse: A spouse who cares about you, your family, and your home is said to be more valuable than jewels.

Q. What qualities should you look for in The One?
Ameena: Look for a person who will bring tranquility, love, and mercy into your life. What is most valuable in a mate is the character of that person, not just a profession. If you are looking for someone in the mindset of “slim, fair-skinned medical doctor seeks attractive, outgoing MD,” that is too superficial. Islam teaches that you should seek out someone who is compatible with you. A person’s character will hold a relationship together or tear it apart.

Father Albert: What are the things you like to see in yourself? What are the things you want to see in someone you are seriously thinking of spending time — and possibly your life — with? A lot of couples waste time in the first stage of dating by not really getting to know each other. Find out: Do you share the same values, the same traditions, similar backgrounds? Do you have certain pet peeves? Are there traditions your partner must respect and honor? How do they view themselves? Do they meet your expectations professionally, socio-economically, educationally? Is this someone who shares your basic ideas about life and what is important in it? These things are visible early in dating. If you don’t have a sense of these things in a person early on, you won’t change them later.

Rabbi Sue: Choose someone who will respect and value you.

Q. What dating advice do you have for interfaith relationships?
Ameena: Putting a man and a woman together in a relationship is plenty challenging, and that is only exacerbated when you mix faiths. Be honest about your expectations, and talk about possible conflicts: How will your families feel about each other? If you have children, what faith will they follow? How stable are you in your faith practice? Also recognize that when one person becomes more religious in time, problems often arise.

Rabbi Sue: Think about what you both want in your future. Love does not conquer all, and it is important to work through the questions and to understand where your partner is coming from. What does it mean to each of you to create a Jewish home? Is it important to you to celebrate certain holidays? If the non-Jewish partner really wants a Christmas tree, how does the Jewish partner feel about that? What are the beliefs that will shape your life together? That’s important for any couple to answer, and especially so if the two of you are from different faiths.

Father Albert: Get to know what’s in your date’s heart. Open up to different traditions, values, and worldviews. Some people are very good at being open, and others are intolerant. People of different faith backgrounds can be OK together if both of you are open and tolerant.

Jennifer Derryberry Mann is a freelance writer and editor in Minneapolis. She writes about spiritual, emotional, and physical well-being for Spirituality & Health. She is the former editor of Science & Spirit.  

25 Hottest Schools

Subjective also means this isn't an official ranking. You may have heard this past spring that an organization of liberal-arts colleges called the Annapolis Group issued a statement saying some member schools would stop participating in the part of the U.S. News & World Report's annual survey in which college administrators assess peer schools using a numerical system. The move was a reaction to a longstanding controversy about the usefulness of numerical listings that order institutions by how they fare on a range of statistical measures. Critics say these measures don't give a full picture of a school. Instead of a numerical ranking, our list is a quick but colorful snapshot of today's most interesting schools. We've talked to a range of experts—admissions officials, educational consultants, students, parents, and college and university leaders—in making our selections. We've been particularly influenced by the views of high-school counselors, the people most in tune with what matters to the latest wave of college applicants.

Some of these schools are large. Some are tiny. Some charge more than $40,000 a year and some only a tenth that amount. Some are celebrated, but one was completely unknown to us and several experts we consulted until a well-traveled counselor pointed it out. All the schools have strong programs that can change young lives for the better. Being hot for the moment is as good an excuse as any for applicants to see if one of them might be just right for them.

Hottest Ivy
Cornell University, Ithaca, N.Y.

Unlike the other Ivies, Cornell is a land-grant college emphasizing problem solving as well as scholarly debate. The university boasts a world-class engineering college and top-flight liberal arts, science and fine arts. The hotel school is considered the world's best. Cornellians, proud of the variety on campus, point to the president, David Skorton, a cardiologist, jazz musician and computer scientist who is the first in his family to have a college education.

Shaul Schwarz / Getty Images for Newsweek Hottest Men's College: Morehouse College in Atlanta, which educated Martin Luther King Jr, Samuel L. Jackson and Spike Lee, is the nation's largest private men's liberal-arts college, and an exemplar of single sex education

Hottest Men's College
Morehouse College, Atlanta, Ga.

Morehouse has long been known as an educator of black leaders like Martin Luther King Jr., Samuel L. Jackson and Spike Lee. But it may be equally important as an exemplar of single-sex education. With 3,000 students, it is the nation's largest private men's liberal-arts college. Recent grad Marcus Edwards calls the school "the No. 1 institution for black men." Goldman Sachs has just donated $2 million to endow a new leadership professor, and the Ray Charles Performing Arts Center is now going up.

Hottest for No SAT or ACT Needed
Bates College, Lewiston, Maine

Many colleges are SAT- or ACT-optional only for students with very good grades. But at Bates, applicants never have to submit their test scores, and half do not. The liberal-arts school, with about 1,700 students in central Maine, gets high marks on various college rankings. Students like Alex Chou, valedictorian at his Old Orchard Beach, Maine, high school, love the no-test-score option. "My high school did not prepare us for the SATs," he says. When Chou applied, he thought his 1220 score would hurt him, so he didn't submit it. He got in, and graduated this spring summa cumlaude. Once at Bates, students say they like that professors are hired particularly for their teaching ability, the relaxed social atmosphere free of fraternities and sororities, and the international atmosphere—70 percent of students study abroad.

Hottest for Science and Engineering
California Institute of Technology, Pasadena, Calif.

Caltech students think of themselves as geeks with power tools. On a beach weekend they may get sand kicked in their faces, but their assailant will soon find his car disassembled and reassembled on top of a lifeguard station, with the engine still running. There are only 900 undergraduates, and admission is very competitive: 17 percent get in. The lucky ones go on to reap the wealth and fame that come to them in an era in which so many of our troubles—global warming, rush-hour traffic, male-pattern baldness—are thought to be solvable if we just give scientists enough money. Even female Teachers say they have fun once they get used to attending one of the last colleges in America where women are still a distinct minority (30 percent). All students look forward to Ditch Day, when automobiles are sometimes found reassembled in side dorm rooms—with the engines still running.

Hottest Liberal-Arts School You Never Heard Of
Centenary College of Louisiana, Shreveport, La.

When Wendy Andreen, counselor at Memorial Senior High in Houston, visited Centenary, she discovered it had just 1,000 students—half the size of her school. She thought it was too small and too unknown, but then changed her mind. It's "a secret treasure packed with degree options, is five minutes away from a thriving downtown on the riverfront and is sitting on one of Hollywood's latest discoveries for movie locations," she says. It's also a Division I school, the smallest in the country. Centenary is a rare combination of academic innovation, with students creating their own majors, and big-time sports (except football). The college also has a solid reputation in various professions, from performing arts to geology.

Hottest for Rejecting You
Harvard University, Cambridge, Mass.

This was a close one. Harvard rejected 91.03 percent of its applicants to the class of 2011. It seemed likely, once again, to win the trophy for Stingiest Admissions. But wait: Columbia College, part of Columbia University, rejected 91.05 of applicants. Its student newspaper declared it the winner. Some Columbia freshmen, however, attend the School of Engineering and Applied Science or the School of General Studies, which means that only 89.6 percent of applicants felt the pain. Not that any of the people who send out all those thin envelopes are happy about it. The über-selective Ivies know their admission process is a dreary march toward disappointment. The Harvard admissions office, the prime offender, particularly feels the strain. Its top officials recently coauthored an essay in The Harvard Crimson, saying they hoped the elimination of Early Decision (along with Princeton's and the University of Virginia's) will give students more time to consider where to apply. That may reduce autumn-application pressure, but nine out of 10 of those candidates will still likely be getting bad news.

Hottest for Election Year
Claremont McKenna College, Claremont, Calif.

Two of every five CMC students major in government/international relations. Most of the rest are also talking politics, the campus obsession. Few selective colleges in America have such ideologically balanced faculties and student bodies. Speakers like Bill Clinton and Justice Antonin Scalia dropped by last spring, and neither was tarred and feathered. CMC, one of the five Claremont Colleges, is vibrating with anticipation of the 2008 presidential race. Andrew Lee, a recent graduate and political junkie who created the Fantasy Congress Web site, says that on long campus weekends he and his friends would skip the beach and drive to a state with a hot election and knock on doors for their favorites.

Shaul Schwarz / Getty Images for Newsweek Hottest on the Rebound: Despite Hurricane Katrina's woeful legacy, New Orleans' Tulane University is bouncing back. This year's intake of 1,400 students is 56% higher than the previous year, a level the university thought would take three years to achieve

Hottest for Free Tuition
Cooper Union for the Advancement of Science and Art, New York, N.Y.

This collection of 1,000 undergrads in the East Village of Manhattan is one of the oddest, and most selective, colleges in the country. Tuition is free, even for millionaires' kids, but the Cooper Union mantra is they all pay for it in sweat and blood because of demanding courses and tough grading. There are just three majors—architecture, art and engineering. That produces an unusual mix of computer engineers and introspective painters. The big excitement on campus, particularly for the architecture majors, is the new nine-story academic building, the city's first green college laboratory building with a cogeneration plant, radiant ceiling heating and cooling panels, and photovoltaic panels.

Hottest Mega-University
University of California, Los Angeles, Los Angeles, Calif.

Coming from a small Roman Catholic high school, Joe Iniguez found the 37,000-student UCLA campus was just what he wanted. "I wanted to experience something bigger," he says. Some students, of course, find the university daunting, but the opportunities are so vast and the undergrads so smart (the freshman class had an average GPA of 4.3) that most find their niche. With degrees in 120 majors, hundreds of undergrads do publishable research with senior faculty.

Hottest Catholic School
Fordham University, New York, N.Y.

Amanda Fiscina was one of only 300 national semifinalists in the Intel Science Talent Search. That virtually wrote her ticket to an Ivy League school. So why did she pick Fordham? Although she's Roman Catholic, Fiscina had gone to public schools on Long Island, and wasn't thinking about a Catholic college until she attended a Fordham information session. She was impressed not just by the academics, but the school's commitment "to prepare us as people with strong morals, values and ethical behavioral standards." With 7,700 undergrads, Fordham has mostly small classes, never more than 25 students in Fiscina's first year.

Hottest Big-City School
Georgetown University, Washington, D.C.

Washington's place in American history and culture keeps the annual flow of applications to Georgetown to more than 16,000, with only 20 percent accepted. Coming from Rhode Island, recent graduate Alana Chloe Esposito says she was thrilled with "internship opportunities, a fun off-campus social life" and being close to the nation's leaders. Classmate Jessica Kuntz says, "JT III didn't hurt," meaning she was drawn to the Hoya basketball team led by John Thompson III, son of Georgetown national-champion coach John Thompson Jr. With 6,300 undergrads, Georgetown is a leader in international studies. Enhancing that reputation: a new campus in Qatar and former secretary of State Madeleine Albright on the faculty.

Hottest for Pre-Meds
Johns Hopkins University, Baltimore, Md.

The school's world-class labs and computer facilities have long been a draw, particularly for students studying anatomy and physiology. But Denver-based educational consultant Steven Antonoff sees it as more than that. "Social life has picked up in recent years," he says, "and there are wonderful humanities, music and public-policy/international studies." Bill Conley, dean of enrollment and academic services, says that increasing appreciation of the school's other academic strengths and its lovely campus in the middle of Baltimore have caused a 66 percent jump in Regular Decision applications and a 94 percent increase in Early Decision applications since 2002.

Sara Stathas for Newsweek Hottest in the War on Terror: New Mexico Institute of Mining and Technology in Socorro, an hour south of Albuquerque, has become a prime research center for fighting the War on Terror. Searching suitcases and disabling roadside explosives are among the things you can learn, along with golf on the 18-hole course

Hottest Small State School
State University of New York at New Paltz, New Paltz, N.Y.

Alicia Mejias chose SUNY New Paltz because it was just 90 minutes from her family in Brooklyn, didn't cost too much and had a step team. Her only concern was she'd be one of the few Hispanics on the rural campus of 6,400 undergrads. That worry was allayed by a rush of festivities that included Jam Asia, Carribash and Latino Week. "Since I was the first in my family to attend college," she says, "I didn't know what to expect." She concluded New Paltz was a place "where anyone should be able to grow." More first-generation college students are enrolling. The school recently opened a 57,000-square-foot Athletic and Wellness Center with an indoor track.

Hottest for Liberal Arts
Princeton University, Princeton, N.J.

Max Staller chose Princeton in 2004 because it met both his professional and his artistic needs. He wanted a career in scientific research, and the biology courses were perfect. But he's also pursued his interest in the arts by picking minors in theater and dance. Many of his classmates have, like him, both careerist and intellectual leanings. Junior Sarah Dajani loves it that "lampposts overflow with fliers advertising the next lecture by a Nobel laureate or performance by the French theater troupe." The emphasis lately is to make sure such opportunities are not confined to rich students who can afford them. The university has recently become one of very few to offer grants, not loans, to those who qualify for financial aid, with 54 percent of the incoming freshman class receiving on average $31,000 in grants apiece.

Hottest for First-Generation Students
Queens College (City University of New York), Queens, N.Y.

Although its families are becoming more affluent, Queens College remains a likely choice for students whose parents never went to college (38 percent of the student body). Its most celebrated recent fictional graduate is Ugly Betty—Betty Suarez—the working-class character played by America Ferrera on the ABC comedy. The school's biggest claim to fame is the several generations of lawyers, doctors and other professionals who could not afford the Ivies and say Queens changed their lives. It's still a bargain with tuition of $4,000. It looks nothing like the big city campuses of Manhattan. It has 77 acres of rolling lawns and a tree-lined Quad.

Hottest for Loving the Great Outdoors
St. Mary's College of Maryland, St. Mary's, Md.

This state school on the southern shores of Maryland has all the advantages of a small liberal-arts college without budget-breaking tuition. The academically rigorous school also has deep ties to nature. St. Mary's 1,900 undergrads take advantage of being on the St. Mary's River. "From sailing, swimming, fishing, beach bonfires, kayaking and crabbing to polar-bear swims, windsurfing, using a seine net for a bio class or just playing with the bioluminescent algae, the river is the single greatest stress reliever on campus," says junior Shane Hall. The sailing team won two national championships this year, and the May Day festivities were as raucous as usual. "Who wouldn't want to strip naked, paint themselves in psychedelic designs and colors, and bike through a crowd of several hundred people at high noon?" asks Hall.

Hottest Women's College
Smith College, Northampton, Mass.

With 2,800 students, Smith is the nation's largest women's college, and the first to start an engineering program. It is part of the Five Colleges consortium with nearby Mount Holyoke, Amherst, Hampshire and UMass Amherst. The facilities, particularly the cottage-style houses where students live in groups of 13 to 80, are so attractive that visitors originally preferring a coed college often change their minds. "Smith kind of won me over," says Katie Green, who thought she would go to a school with men. "When else in your life can you get the experience of being surrounded by smart, motivated young women who really care about what they're doing?"

Hottest Music School
Eastman School of Music, Rochester, N.Y.

Eastman is heaven for instrumentalists, but students also get to study at the University of Rochester, of which it is a part. It's perfect for aspiring musicians who don't want to sacrifice academics. That's why bassist Erin McPeck of Aurora, Colo., chose Eastman; she's now planning a scholarly career in music research while working as a physics teaching intern at Rochester and participating in Eastman's Institute for Music Leadership. Applications were up 10 percent this year, more than the national average.

Hottest for Saving America's Schools
University of Texas-Austin, Austin, Texas

Texas's flagship state university is rising to new prominence in education reform. UT-Austin researchers like economist Chrys Dougherty have done landmark work on the effects of Advanced Placement high-school courses on college success. UT mathematician Uri Treisman has led the way in raising the level of instruction for minority children. A rapidly expanding program called UTeach recruits science and math majors into teaching with classroom experience as early as freshman year. "The kind of mentoring I received from master teachers was really important," says Katie Weber, a 2004 UTeach alum who teaches seventh-grade science. The Teach for America program on campus is soaring, with the number of new graduates heading for inner-city and rural classroom assignments increasing from 24 to 62 in just a year.

Hottest Big State School
University of Wisconsin-Madison, Madison, Wis.

Growing up in Wisconsin, Laura Sullivan was raised on Badger mania. But she was initially afraid that she would get lost in Madison amid 41,000 students, 140 undergraduate majors and nearly 700 student organizations. So when her high-school German class visited, Sullivan says she was shocked to find that she immediately felt at home. The tree-filled campus of nearly 1,000 acres looked to her exactly like a college should. It occurred to her that its enormity actually meant "endless opportunities," she says. It is the old traditions graduates remember most, including Picnic Point, declared by one newspaper to be "the kissing-est spot in North America."

Hottest for International Studies
University of Richmond, Richmond, VA.

Seventy percent of the class of 2007 studied abroad, attending universities in Oxford, Edinburgh, Prague, Milan, Buenos Aires, Hong Kong, Bangkok and other cosmopolitan spots. The 3,000-student university has exchange agreements with more than 50 schools around the world and ensures that time spent abroad costs no more than time on campus. The faculty is strong in many areas, particularly business, science and leadership studies, but all students are urged to see the world.

Hottest for Business
Babson College, Babson Park, Mass.

Just as violinists know why they're at Juilliard, and physicists at Caltech, the 1,700 students attending Babson understand what made them choose this small campus. They are entrepreneurs, and no school does a better job than Babson in teaching how to start businesses. Jason Reuben grew up in Los Angeles and by fourth grade was selling ketchup packets at his elementary school's Friday barbecues. He started a Web design firm in high school. He knew Babson was for him when, during a campus visit, he saw all the people in one lecture hall pull out their laptops to look up business data.

Don’t tease me. Please say that we can buy this stuff somewhere, because I’d wear all of this right this minute. Well except for the welding mask and the metallic leggings, but seriously, how hot was his collection? Answer: extremely. The color, the hand detailing, I love it all.

These 12 foods make up a large part of your diet. The more of these foods you eat, the better your body will be able to increase lean muscle mass and avoid storing fat.

They have been proven to do one or more of the following:

 Though you can base entire meals and snacks around these foods, you don't have to. But do follow these guidelines:

• Incorporate two or three of these foods into each of your three major meals and at least one of them into each of your three snacks.
• Diversify your food at every meal to get a combination of protein, carbohydrates, and fat.
• Make sure you sneak a little bit of protein into each snack.

1. Almonds and Other Nuts
Eat them with skins intact.

Superpowers: Building muscle, fighting food cravings

Secret weapons: Protein, monounsaturated fats, vitamin E, folate (in peanuts), fiber, magnesium, phosphorus

Fight against: Obesity, heart disease, muscle loss, cancer

Sidekicks: Pumpkin seeds, sunflower seeds, avocados

Impostors: Salted or smoked nuts. High sodium spikes blood pressure.

These days, you hear about good fats and bad fats the way you hear about good cops and bad cops. One's on your side, and one's going to beat you silly. Oreos fall into the latter category, but nuts are clearly out to help you. They contain the monounsaturated fats that clear your arteries and help you feel full. All nuts are high in protein and monounsaturated fat.

But almonds are like Jack Nicholson in One Flew over the Cuckoo's Nest: They're the king of the nuts. Eat as much as two handfuls a day. If you eat 2 ounces of almonds (about 24 of them), it can suppress your appetite—especially if you wash them down with 8 ounces of water.

For a quick popcorn alternative, spray a handful of almonds with nonstick cooking spray and bake them at 400 degrees F for 5 to 10 minutes. Take them out of the oven and sprinkle them with either a brown sugar and cinnamon mix or cayenne pepper and thyme.

2. Beans and Other Legumes

Including soybeans, chickpeas, pinto beans, navy beans, kidney beans, lima beans.

Superpowers: Building muscle, helping burn fat, regulating digestion

Secret weapons: Fiber, protein, iron, folate

Fight against: Obesity, colon cancer, heart disease, high blood pressure

Sidekicks: Lentils, peas, bean dips, hummus, edamame

Impostors: Refried beans, which are high in saturated fats; baked beans, which are high in sugar.

Most of us can trace our resistance to beans to some unfortunately timed intestinal upheaval (third-grade math class, a first date gone awry). But beans are, as the famous rhyme says, good for your heart; the more you eat them, the more you'll be able to control your hunger.

Black, lima, pinto, navy — you pick it. They're all low in fat, and they're packed with protein, fiber, and iron—nutrients crucial for building muscle and losing weight. Gastrointestinal disadvantages notwithstanding, they serve as one of the key members of the Abs Diet cabinet because of all their nutritional power. In fact, if you can replace a meat-heavy dish with a bean-heavy dish a couple of times a week, you'll be lopping a lot of saturated fat out of your diet and replacing it with higher amounts of fiber.

 

 

3. Spinach and Other Green Vegetables

Superpowers: Neutralizing free radicals (molecules that accelerate the aging process)

Secret weapons: Vitamins including A, C, and K; folate; beta-carotene; minerals including calcium and magnesium; fiber

Fight against: Cancer, heart disease, stroke, obesity, osteoporosis

Sidekicks: Cruciferous vegetables like broccoli and brussels sprouts; green, yellow, red, and orange vegetables such as asparagus, peppers, and yellow beans

Impostors: None, as long as you don't fry them or smother them in fatty cheese sauces.

You know vegetables are packed with important nutrients, but they're also a critical part of your body-changing diet. I like spinach in particular because one serving supplies nearly a full day's vitamin A and half of your vitamin C. It's also loaded with folate — a vitamin that protects against heart disease, stroke, and colon cancer. Dress a sandwich with the stuff, or stir-fry it with fresh garlic and olive oil.

Broccoli is high in fiber and more densely packed with vitamins and minerals than almost any other food. If you hate vegetables, hide them. Puree them and add them to marinara sauce or chili. The more you chop, the less you taste, and the easier it is for your body to absorb nutrients. With broccoli, sauté it in garlic and olive oil, and douse it with hot sauce.

4. Dairy Products
Fat-free or low-fat milk, yogurt, cheese, cottage cheese.

Superpowers: Building strong bones, firing up weight loss

Secret weapons: Calcium, vitamins A and B12, riboflavin, phosphorus, potassium

Fight against: Osteoporosis, obesity, high blood pressure, cancer

Sidekicks: None

Impostors: Whole milk, frozen yogurt

Dairy is nutrition's version of a typecast actor. It gets so much good press for strengthening bones that it garners little attention for all the other stuff it does well. Just take a look at the mounting evidence that calcium is a prime belly-buster. A University of Tennessee study found that dieters who consumed between 1,200 and 1,300 milligrams of calcium a day lost nearly twice as much weight as those taking in less calcium. Researchers think the mineral probably prevents weight gain by increasing the breakdown of body fat and hampering its formation. Low-fat yogurt, cheeses, and other dairy products can play a key role in your diet. But I recommend milk as your major source of calcium. Liquids take up lots of room in your stomach, so your brain gets the signal that you're full. Sprinkling in chocolate whey powder can help curb sweet cravings.

5. Instant Oatmeal

Unsweetened, unflavored.

Superpowers: Boosting energy and sex drive, reducing cholesterol, maintaining blood-sugar levels

Secret weapons: Complex carbohydrates and fiber

Fights against: Heart disease, diabetes, colon cancer, obesity

Sidekicks: High-fiber cereals like All-Bran and Fiber One

Impostors: Sugary cereals

Oatmeal is the Bo Derek of your pantry: It's a perfect 10. You can eat it at breakfast to propel you through sluggish mornings, a couple of hours before a workout to feel fully energized by the time you hit the weights, or at night to avoid a late-night binge. I recommend instant oatmeal for its convenience. But I want you to buy the unsweetened, unflavored variety and use other Powerfoods such as milk and berries to enhance the taste. Preflavored oatmeal often comes loaded with sugar calories.

Oatmeal contains soluble fiber, meaning that it attracts fluid and stays in your stomach longer than insoluble fiber (like vegetables). Soluble fiber is thought to reduce blood cholesterol by binding with digestive acids made from cholesterol and sending them out of your body. When this happens, your liver has to pull cholesterol from your blood to make more digestive acids, and your bad cholesterol levels drop.

Trust me:

You need more fiber, both soluble and insoluble. Doctors recommend we get between 25 and 35 grams of fiber per day, but most of us get half that. Fiber is like a bouncer for your body, kicking out troublemakers and showing them the door. It protects you from heart disease. It protects you from colon cancer by sweeping carcinogens out of the intestines quickly.

A Penn State study also showed that oatmeal sustains your blood sugar levels longer than many other foods, which keeps your insulin levels stable and ensures you won't be ravenous for the few hours that follow. That's good, because spikes in the production of insulin slow your metabolism and send a signal to the body that it's time to start storing fat. Since oatmeal breaks down slowly in the stomach, it causes less of a spike in insulin levels than foods like bagels. Include it in a smoothie or as your breakfast. (A U.S. Navy study showed that simply eating breakfast raised metabolism by 10 percent.)

Another cool fact about oatmeal:Preliminary studies indicate that oatmeal raises the levels of free testosterone in your body, enhancing your body's ability to build muscle and burn fat and boosting your sex drive.

6. Eggs

Superpowers: Building muscle, burning fat

Secret weapons: Protein, vitamins A and B12

Fight against: Obesity

Sidekicks: Egg Beaters, which have fewer calories than eggs and no fat, but just as much of the core nutrients

Impostors: None

For a long time, eggs were considered pure evil, and doctors were more likely to recommend tossing eggs at passing cars than throwing them into omelette pans. That's because just two eggs contain enough cholesterol to put you over your daily recommended value. Though you can cut out some of that by removing part of the yolk and using the white, more and more research shows that eating an egg or two a day will not raise your cholesterol levels.

In fact, we've learned that most blood cholesterol is made by the body from dietary fat, not dietary cholesterol. That's why you should take advantage of eggs and their powerful makeup of protein. The protein found in eggs has the highest "biological value" of protein — a measure of how well it supports your body's protein need — of any food. In other words, the protein in eggs is more effective at building muscle than protein from other sources, even milk and beef. Eggs also contain vitamin B12, which is necessary for fat breakdown.

7. Turkey and Other Lean Meats
Lean steak, chicken, fish.

Superpowers: Building muscle, improving the immune system

Secret weapons: Protein, iron, zinc, creatine (beef), omega-3 fatty acids (fish), vitamins B6 (chicken and fish) and B12, phosphorus, potassium

Fight against: Obesity, mood disorders, memory loss, heart disease

Sidekicks: Shellfish, Canadian bacon, omega-3 rich flaxseed

Impostors: Sausage, bacon, cured meats, ham, fatty cuts of steak like T-bone and rib eye

A classic muscle-building nutrient, protein is the base of any solid diet plan. Turkey breast is one of the leanest meats you'll find, and it packs nearly one-third of your daily requirements of niacin and vitamin B6. Dark meat, if you prefer, has lots of zinc and iron. One caution, though: If you're roasting a whole turkey for a family feast, avoid self-basting birds, which have been injected with fat.

Beef is another classic muscle-building protein. It's the top food source for creatine — the substance your body uses when you lift weights. Beef does have a downside; it contains saturated fats, but some cuts have more than others. Look for rounds or loins (that's code for extra-lean); sirloins and New York strips are less fatty than prime ribs and T-bones.

To cut down on saturated fats even more, concentrate on fish like tuna and salmon, because they contain a healthy dose of omega-3 fatty acids as well as protein. Those fatty acids lower levels of a hormone called leptin in your body. Several recent studies suggest that leptin directly influences your metabolism: The higher your leptin levels, the more readily your body stores calories as fat. Researchers at the University of Wisconsin found that mice with low leptin levels have faster metabolisms and are able to burn fat faster than animals with higher leptin levels. Mayo Clinic researchers studying the diets of two African tribes found that the tribe that ate fish frequently had leptin levels nearly five times lower than the tribe that primarily ate vegetables.

A bonus benefit: Researchers in Stockholm found that men who ate no fish had three times the risk of prostate cancer of those who ate it regularly. It's the omega-3s that inhibit prostate-cancer growth.

8. Peanut Butter
All-natural, sugar-free.

Superpowers: Boosting testosterone, building muscle, burning fat

Secret weapons: Protein, monounsaturated fat, vitamin E, niacin, magnesium

Fights against: Obesity, muscle loss, wrinkles, cardiovascular disease

Sidekicks: Cashew and almond butters

Impostors: Mass-produced sugary and trans fatty peanut butters

Yes, PB has its disadvantages: It's high in calories, and it doesn't go over well when you order it in four-star restaurants. But it's packed with those heart-healthy monounsaturated fats that can increase your body's production of testosterone, which can help your muscles grow and your fat melt. In one 18-month experiment, people who integrated peanut butter into their diet maintained weight loss better than those on low-fat plans. A recent study from the University of Illinois showed that diners who had monounsaturated fats before a meal (in this case, it was olive oil) ate 25 percent fewer calories during that meal than those who didn't.

Practically speaking, PB also works because it's a quick and versatile snack — and it tastes good. Since a diet that includes an indulgence like peanut butter doesn't leave you feeling deprived, it's easier to follow and won't make you fall prey to other cravings. Use it on an apple, on the go, or to add flavor to potentially bland smoothies. Two caveats: You can't gorge on it because of its fat content; limit yourself to about 3 tablespoons per day. And you should look for all-natural peanut butter, not the mass-produced brands that have added sugar.

9. Olive Oil

Superpowers: Lowering cholesterol, boosting the immune system

Secret weapons: Monounsaturated fat, vitamin E

Fights against: Obesity, cancer, heart disease, high blood pressure

Sidekicks: Canola oil, peanut oil, sesame oil

Impostors: Other vegetable and hydrogenated vegetable oils, trans fatty acids, margarine

No need for a long explanation here: Olive oil and its brethren will help control your food cravings; they'll also help you burn fat and keep your cholesterol in check. Do you need any more reason to pass the bottle?

10. Whole-Grain Breads and Cereals

Superpowers: Preventing your body from storing fat

Secret weapons: Fiber, protein, thiamin, riboflavin, niacin, vitamin E, calcium, magnesium, potassium, zinc

Fight against: Obesity, cancer, high blood pressure, heart disease

Sidekicks: Brown rice, whole-wheat pretzels, whole-wheat pastas

Impostors: Processed bakery products like white bread, bagels, and doughnuts; breads labeled wheat instead of whole wheat

There's only so long a person can survive on an all-protein diet or an all-salad diet or an all-anything diet. You crave carbohydrates because your body needs them. The key is to eat the ones that have been the least processed — carbs that still have all their heart-healthy, belly-busting fiber intact.

Grains like wheat, corn, oats, barley, and rye are seeds that come from grasses, and they're broken into three parts — the germ, the bran, and the endosperm. Think of a kernel of corn.

The biggest part of the kernel — the part that blows up when you make popcorn — is the endosperm. Nutritionally it's pretty much a big dud. It contains starch, a little protein, and some B vitamins. The germ is the smallest part of the grain; in the corn kernel, it's that little white seedlike thing. But while it's small, it packs the most nutritional power. It contains protein, oils, and the B vitamins thiamin, riboflavin, niacin, and pyridoxine. It also has vitamin E and the minerals magnesium, zinc, potassium, and iron. The bran is the third part of the grain and the part where all the fiber is stored. It's a coating around the endosperm that contains B vitamins, zinc, calcium, potassium, magnesium, and other minerals.

So what's the point of this little biology lesson? Well, get this: When food manufacturers process and refine grains, guess which two parts get tossed out? Yup, the bran, where all the fiber and minerals are, and the germ, where all the protein and vitamins are. And what they keep—the nutritionally bankrupt endosperm (that is, starch)—gets made into pasta, bagels, white bread, white rice, and just about every other wheat product and baked good you'll find. Crazy, right? But if you eat products made with all the parts of the grain—whole-grain bread, pasta, long-grain rice—you get all the nutrition that food manufacturers are otherwise trying to cheat you out of.

Whole-grain carbohydrates can play an important role in a healthy lifestyle. In an 11-year study of 16,000 middle-age people, researchers at the University of Minnesota found that consuming three daily servings of whole grains can reduce a person's mortality risk over the course of a decade by 23 percent. (Tell that to your buddy who's eating low-carb.) Whole-grain bread keeps insulin levels low, which keeps you from storing fat. In this diet, it's especially versatile because it'll supplement any kind of meal with little prep time. Toast for breakfast, sandwiches for lunch, with a dab of peanut butter for a snack. Don't believe the hype. Carbs—the right kind of carbs—are good for you.

Warning: Food manufacturers are very sneaky. Sometimes, after refining away all the vitamins, fiber, and minerals from wheat, they'll add molasses to the bread, turning it brown, and put it on the grocery shelf with a label that says wheat bread. It's a trick! Truly nutritious breads and other products will say whole-wheat or whole-grain. Don't be fooled.

11. Extra-Protein (Whey) Powder

Superpowers: Building muscle, burning fat

Secret weapons: Protein, cysteine, glutathione

Fights against: Obesity

Sidekick: Ricotta cheese

Impostor: Soy protein

Protein powder? What the heck is that? It's the only Abs Diet Powerfood that you may not be able to find at the supermarket, but it's the one that's worth the trip to a health food store. I'm talking about powdered whey protein, a type of animal protein that packs a muscle-building wallop. If you add whey powder to your meal—in a smoothie, for instance—you may very well have created the most powerful fat-burning meal possible. Whey protein is a high-quality protein that contains essential amino acids that build muscle and burn fat. But it's especially effective because it has the highest amount of protein for the fewest number of calories, making it fat's kryptonite.

Smoothies with some whey powder can be most effective before a workout. A 2001 study at the University of Texas found that lifters who drank a shake containing amino acids and carbohydrates before working out increased their protein synthesis (their ability to build muscle) more than lifters who drank the same shake after exercising. Since exercise increases bloodflow to tissues, the theory goes that having whey protein in your system when you work out may lead to a greater uptake of amino acids — the building blocks of muscle — in your muscle.

But that's not all. Whey protein can help protect your body from prostate cancer. Whey is a good source of cysteine, which your body uses to build a prostate cancer fighting antioxidant called glutathione. Adding just a small amount may increase glutathione levels in your body by up to 60 percent.

By the way, the one great source of whey protein in your supermarket is ricotta cheese. Unlike other cheeses, which are made from milk curd, ricotta is made from whey — a good reason to visit your local Italian eatery.

12. Raspberries and Other Berries

Superpowers: Protecting your heart, enhancing eyesight, improving memory, preventing cravings

Secret weapons: Antioxidants, fiber, vitamin C, tannins (cranberries)

Fight against: Heart disease, cancer, obesity

Sidekicks: Most other fruits, especially apples and grapefruit

Impostors: Sugary jellies

Depending on your taste, any berry will do (except Crunch Berries). I like raspberries as much for their power as for their taste. They carry powerful levels of antioxidants, all-purpose compounds that help your body fight heart disease and cancer; the berries' flavonoids may also help your eyesight, balance, coordination, and short-term memory. One cup of raspberries packs 6 grams of fiber and more than half of your daily requirement of vitamin C.

Blueberries are also loaded with the soluble fiber that, like oatmeal, keeps you fuller longer. In fact, they're one of the most healthful foods you can eat. Blueberries beat out 39 other fruits and vegetables in the antioxidant power ratings. (One study also found that rats that ate blueberries were more coordinated and smarter than rats that didn't.)

Strawberries contain another valuable form of fiber called pectin (as do grapefruits, peaches, apples, and oranges). In a study from the Journal of the American College of Nutrition, subjects drank plain orange juice or juice spiked with pectin. The people who got the loaded juice felt fuller after drinking it than those who got the juice without the pectin. The difference lasted for an impressive 4 hours.

Here's an easy way to remember what's good for you. The first letter of each food group spells: A.B.S.D.I.E.T.P.O.W.E.R 12

Or click here for an entire listing of all the Abs Diet recipes on Menshealth.com.